Ride the horse in the direction that it’s going.

– Werner Erhard

I’ve been re-reading a wonderful book about the application of improv theatre techniques to corporate America. The book is called Training To Imagine, and using the fundamentals of improvisational theatre, the writer Kat Koppett, has assembled a range of fabulous exercises to enhance creativity, teamwork and leadership.

According to Kat, theatre improvisers have developed a set of approaches and agreements designed to create a culture of innovation and collaboration on stage. The fundamental skills that improvisers develop are: Trust, Spontaneity, Accepting offers, Listening and Awareness, Storytelling and Non-verbal communication.

Accepting offers is the improv skill that caught my attention for this newsletter. In improv, ideas and actions – words, physical actions, emotional responses, lines of dialogue—are called “offers.” Anything your partner does or says is an offer. All you have when you are up there on the stage winging your way through an improvisational moment are the offers of your improv partner. If you reject what they create or say, you effectively stall the improv because the two of you are working at cross purposes instead of building together.

I think the business application of accepting offers is profound. How many times a day do we reject the ‘offers’ of our colleagues and at what cost? We reject by provisionally listening and then moving on in a meeting; we reject by shooting bullets in a fresh idea because it departs from how we imagine the problem might be solved; we reject by smiling and ignoring; we reject in order to protect our turf, our ideas, our visibility; we reject because the idea seems impossible to make real; we reject because we don’t like the person who is offering the idea; we reject because we think the idea is bad. The list of why we reject is long, long, long!

Now we know that all ideas are not created equal, and I am certainly not advocating an environment with little rigor or analysis around the value of a new idea. What I do believe, though, is that each time we discard an unexpected, zany or complex idea without real consideration something is lost both for the organization and for the individual who shared his thinking. The organization loses opportunity—who knows where the next ‘great idea’ or unexpected business efficiency will have its humble roots? The individual loses energy and incentive to continue to step forward- an environment with a default ‘no’ effectively kills fresh thinking. Why take a risk when no one is listening anyway?

One of the most common communication patterns we all fall into is to search for the flaw instead of the spark. We say “yes, but….” Instead of “yes, and…” ‘Yes, but’ is a clear conversation stopper. For whatever reason, we are rejecting our colleagues’ offer and shut them down with a simple three-letter word – B U T. But actually, it’s very easy to circumvent blocking—all you need to do is to accept everything as an offer. Instead of focusing on all the clever reason why the idea won’t work, think instead about your objection to an idea as the path to the next idea. How can A spawn B or J?

Try experimenting this week with replacing ‘but’ with ‘and.’ Choosing ‘and’ compels you to build on someone else’s idea. You will be in new territory where instead of summarily dismissing an ‘offer’ you will need to look for the spark and see where it might be possible to build instead of demolish. When you notice your peers ‘but-ing’ their way through a meeting, pick up the thread of someone’s fresh idea and see where you can go with it. After all, saying ‘yes’ is really at the foundation of all relationships. We are all motivated by acceptance.

There is a delightful emotional benefit to burying the buts. People at all levels of your organization will begin to recognize that it is safe and worthwhile to share their thinking and suggestions. You will have invited new thinking to the table without spending a dollar and your staff or peers will be more engaged and happier. Kind of amazing when you realize that all you did was replace one three letter word with another!

The best leaders of all, the people know not they exist.
They turn to each other and say ‘We did it ourselves.’
~ Zen Saying

Dina Silver, MCC, is the Principal of Pegasus Coaching Group, Inc.

I specialize in leadership coaching working with senior executives and their teams to create great leaders and high impact groups. I have enjoyed success working with technically proficient people who need guidance in developing the interpersonal skills that are essential to effective and compelling leadership.

My background in the entertainment industry as a feature film and interactive game producer effectively assists me in helping leaders develop powerful executive presence so that ideas and challenging initiatives are met with keen interest and excitement. In order to lead, people must be excited to follow!

I have enjoyed trusted advisor status with high performance individuals, teams and organizations, coaching in high tech, entertainment, banking, and marketing.

I hold a B.A. in United States History from Princeton University. I am a Master Certified Coach (MCC) and hold my credentialing through the International Coach Federation. In addition, I am certified in a range of assessment tools including DISC and PIAV, and am an active member of Professional Coaches and Mentors Association (PCMA) and the International Coach Federation (ICF). I am married, have two teenage kids, two fat black cats and live in Santa Monica, CA.

If you are interested in learning more about how my work may be of value to you and your organization, please get in touch. I am happy to offer interested prospects a complimentary and confidential half hour coaching session so you can take me and coaching for a test drive.